Saving the post office

Yes, yes I am going to save the post office from bankruptcy…apparently.  It’s all because my daughter fell in love with a British guy.  He better be glad that I like him, cause otherwise I would make his life miserable for taking my daughter to England.

Now, in all honesty, I have to say that I am thrilled that she is getting the opportunity to live in England and travel and see things that I always wanted to see.  I’m also glad that I will probably get to go to England and visit; that will be awesome if it happens.  But in the meantime, I may go broke trying to mail things.  J

I mailed a package last week, she had a Christmas gift shipped here and I needed to forward it, so that was seventy something bucks.  Then today, I send her ‘momma loves you’ package.

 

I have been informed that there are no good pickles in England.  They make all of the pickles sweet.  Well, some people don’t like sweet pickles…some people like hot pickles and sour pickles.  Like my daughter. So I bought some pickles on line to mail her ( and I look back at my past self with an indulgent smile...poor little naïve fool).  And also, she hasn’t been able to find good cheese.  She says they have cheese, but it’s like CHEDDAR…on STEROIDS…that’s been stored in a SOCK.

And even though my son-in-law was in the background making various loud noises,  shocked faces, and hand gestures that all communicated (very clearly) that he thinks European cheese is superior in every way to American cheese, the fact is my  baby girl wants some American cheese.  And some hot pickles. And she wouldn’t really mind having some good tea.  Oh, that one almost caused a stroke; he has such attitude about tea. rofl

My favorite son-in-law story of all time follows:

We are in a restaurant having dinner.  My tea tasted a little old, but I wasn’t sure if it was the tea or if it was me.  So I say “Taste this.  Does this taste funny?” 

He says “All of your tea tastes funny.  I’ve tried so many kinds of tea, but none of them taste right.  I don’t know what lipton is, but they put it in all of the tea, and it just doesn’t taste good!”

I look, in shock, at my daughter, who shrugs (with an evil smile) and says “I just didn’t have the heart to tell him”.

So I struggled to maintain my composure and not bust out laughing, failed miserably, and said ‘’Honey, Lipton isn’t an ingredient, it’s the brand name.”

He says “oh.  Well, it doesn’t taste good”.  Ha ha ha  Good times.

 So, being the loving mother that I am, I got a box and filled it up with American cheese, and string cheese, and hot pickles, and tea bags.  And then I spent $70.00 mailing it.

$70.00 ……… for PICKLES!!

And that wasn’t even all the pickles I bought!  It was just the ones I could fit in the medium size box.  If I had mailed the whole box of pickles, it would have cost $99 and some change to mail it.  So that’s $43.00 for two cases of pickles, and let’s just call it $100 to mail them…*mumbles to self while staring at the ceiling*…43 and 100 is 143 divided by 48 is (mumble mumble)…pretty damn close to $3.00 per pickle.  And you know, some cheese and a couple of tea bags.  Unbelievable!

But that’s what love will do to you. 

Step two in my plan to save the post office:

Bring back writing letters.  Do your part!!!  Maybe send some “it’s not Christmas” cards.  Think how much fun it would be if everyone did it, and you started getting mail that was fun!!  You go to the mailbox, and there’s an envelope that isn’t a bill, or a piece of trash…it’s a note or a card from someone you love!  It will make you smile, and it help save the post office.  I’m pretty sure Ben Franklin would come visit you in your dreams if you helped me save the post office! And hey, maybe someday you’ll get a box full of pickles.  :/